就在刚才读得无奈的那一瞬间，我将那卡片拿了出来

读了上面写的东西后，觉得不可思议。

看似简单的文字，但却给我许多的冲劲。

若你现在还在隔一条海峡的国家，我想我应该不是现在这懒散的我。

事情没办法改变

任命吧

化学 F9

我来了。

"NFTB"

My house modem's wifi died on me and I don't know why.

It has makes me kinda nuts after if went off, I can't online, which makes things worst by me wanting to online more.

I'm such an online addict. =S

I seriously got to change this habit when I go to uni, or else I will suffer like hell.

I so hate chemistry now. =S

If life is like this.

Don't study chem -------> F9 for chem ---------> Get into random uni

--------> random job? -----------------> die

Hmmmm.

That would be a lil simple but yet it's so tempting.

Simplicity rocks! :0

LOL. Enough of crap talking.

"NFTB"

Gotta go to school tomorrow for bio lect.

I know why would I like to go clubbing in the future.

IT'S GOOD MUSIC!

"NFTB"

I'm feeling rather good at this point, although tomorrow's my maths paper, but still, I don't care. I just wanna enjoy this moment where joy is being felt from deep within.

I've always know that life is full of ups and downs, but just never thought of being back in the up part after so many downs.

I think, I kinda found my way, by that I mean, I see myself in the future.

I've decided, Mass Comm it is, and it's not here, it's Singapore Polytechnic.

I know it's gonna cost a lot, but I think I'm gonna gain a lot as well.

So, since I'm gonna work there and pay back the study loan that I've loaned, so why not choose the best education that you're capable of? Well, at least that's what I think.

Although my grades aren't that good, but I don't think their requirement is that high either, well, at least not like NTU or NUS.

So, the possibility of me getting in higher than both of them, and all I got to do now is to study well, and get "good" results.

Hmmm. I think, somehow I might change my thoughts about what I'm gonna study.

Yeah, I think I will, but for what matter mosts is that I need to study which I'm not really doing a lot lately. =S

So, if anything changes, I'll sure update this "dead space".

And to my readers, which I know is not a lot.

THANK YOU

KAM SA HA MI DA

谢谢

TERIMA KASIH

ARIGATO

GAM SIA

DO JIE

For reading my blog.

Singing off.

"NFTB"

Right, I've wasted too much time.

Or at least, that's what I think.

I've not been writing cause things has been quite weird for me.

By that I mean, all the things happened lately just couldn't sum up to a point.

So, I'm not writing.

I've been feeling like this PMS-ing bitch for quite some time.

As I gets angry easily. I feel like yelling all the time, at people who has done nothing to me (but I didn't yell la of course).

Maybe I'm just angry at myself for being what I am right now.

But I'm just gonna let it be, until something changes.

Or at least, I'll get provoked, then I'll start working my ass off again, but till, just let it be.

"NFTB"

Anyway, got school later.

STUDY STUDY STUDY. =S

Finally gonna write something.

Erm.

What did I do today?

Well, woke up feeling a piece of crap due to reasons that I've got no idea why my stupid brain thinks that way.

The thing is that it slipped my mind when you put your hand over my should, then unconsciously, I grabbed your hand.

That's really weird, cause you and him are really similar people.

I reached home, found out that, I'm really lonely.

I've not admitted being lonely since I got back from Singapore, and you kinda made me realized that.

I don't know.

Maybe I gotta change myself, like Kelly Clarkson.

There's only a week left before the exam, and yet, I'm not giving a shit about the exam.

What has gone wrong?

I kept forgiving myself for the shitty results that I'm getting, and yet I'm not doing anything trying to improve myself.

"NFTB"

Should I not think this much?

Should I just let it be?

I think I should just let it be, cause no matter what's the results, I've accepted the fact that I'm gonna be stuck in this box, forever.

I don't get it, why am I doing this to myself.

This it's not the first time.

I kept playing with fire, got burnt, and kept playing with it..

"NFTB"

I'm online right now, I still can't believe it, it's so weird being online with the netbook in school with Wanjie's broadband. hmmm

Well, two days of school and the things I miss the most is practicing everyday in front of the band room then head to dinner with really really cool peeps.

But I don't have much time left, do I.

That's the thing I'm gonna miss the most.

Oh, and there's another one.

I'm gonna miss having breakfast with all of you guys everyday, it has became something that you've gotta do everyday when you come to school, even though you're not eating breakfast, you just come and sit there and enjoy the presence of each other.

Yeah, that's another thing I'll miss about my secondary school life.

"NFTB"

I think there should be more things that I don't wanna forget.

I'll keep updating if I thought of any. =)

What should I say more, this songs just described what is on my mind right now.

"NFTB"

I can't get this out of my mind.

@_@

"NFTB"

I wanna say, I've just finished the stupid chinese essay.

WOOTS.

HAPPY TO THE MAX

I never thought of finishing it, but I did.

So, I should be proud of myself? No.

Cause I did loads of research on the stupid topic and I did a lot summarization.

So, basically my essay is a condense version of tons of web article.

Wanjie said it's kinda phucked up, but I say, who cares if it's phucked up, I don't phucking iPhone 4 care.

Overall, goodbye to stupid chinese essay.

I'm feeling super gay now. =)

'NFTB'

p/s: sorry for the non stop using of the phuck word, just really feeling like using it today.

I DON'T PHUCKING IPHONE 4 CARE! HAHAHAHHA

WHY AM I WRITING IN CAPS LOCK?

BECAUSE I'M FREAKING FREAKING PISSED AT THE STUPID CHINESE ESSAY.

I'VE GOT NO PHUCKING IDEA HOW TO WRITE THAT STUPID ESSAY.

MY GOD, WHO GIVES YOU A STUPID STORY AND WANTS YOU TO COME UP WITH YOUR OWN TOPIC, LIKE SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE PHUCKED?

SINCE I'M NOT GOOD IN BOTH OF THE LANGUAGES THAT I SPEAK,

HOW AM I GONNA WRITE A PHUCKING CHINESE ESSAY WITH NO TOPIC?

I DON'T GET IT, THAT STUPID PIECE OF SHIT IS STRESSING THE HELL OUT OF ME.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH/.

PHUCK YOU CHINESE ESSAY.

I've been staring at this space for like 15 minutes.

Nothing came out.

There's so much anger inside me.

I wanna run, but where to?

I wanna scream, but where to?

I wanna be in your arms, but where?

"NFTB"

I gotta get back up, to where I was.

This is not who I am, and not what I want to be.

Well, everything leads to your own desire of whether to do it or not.

If you don't wanna do it, no matter how you force yourself, you won't do it.

I think I should do talk to mind more, to let it think that I've got no more time left to goof around.

"NFTB"

Super a-yer-ness

What the hell am I doing?

Is this the life that you wanted?

I don't know.

I can't figure out what I want anymore, or to a point, I'm just trying make myself suffer.

I don't know.

"NFTB"

God, I need to awake myself.

It feels so good to be home, especially when you went to an under developed country.

It's not that I'm complaining that my mum put so much effort for taking us there, it's just that I don't like Bali, it was not what I expected.

It's such a ..... place, I can't even find words to describe the place.

Maybe it's because of the place that I stayed so I'm not really fond of the place, but all the food I ate were really lousy, the best I had was KFC, seriously, KFC.

Yeah, I rather go to Singapore for 10 times than going there once more.

And thank god, I'm home again.

I miss my home.

To you.

You were on my mind the whole trip.

While waiting for time to pass, I kinda pictured us going on a real trip, not like the last one we had.

I don't know, cause some part of me still wants to linger on, but the other part just wants to run away, but there's no one to run to, so that leads back to you.

Aiks, dilemma.

"NFTB"

Off to bed, gotta do math when I wake up later.

Found this insanely good Japanese song.

Well, got stuck to the song is mostly because of the choir behind. hahha.

Plus, the singer looks like my chemistry teacher. LOL!!

"NFTB"