I think this is the most depressed state that I have ever been in.
I'm depressed for no particular reasons and this shitty feeling that I'm feeling is eating me, slowly.

I was late for work two weeks straight.
I don't feel like talking to anyone when i get into work.
I can barely wake up in the morning.
I feel like slapping everyone.
Hanging out the guys doesn't even help.

I just hate the need to justify myself to myself.
Tell myself that things are like this because of these theses and that.
It's just an endless cycle of self belittling.

Maybe this is the sign that I need to turn to some religion for an answer, an answer of all these shitty feeling that I feel.
Or maybe I am this unhappy because of the choices I've made.
Thinking that what was right back then now seem so wrong.

"NFTB"
I believe there's no right or wrong, just a matter of perception at the moment.

I like how we have become nowadays, or at least how I have become, to possess the incapability of writing an essay, or short paragraphs when I am not forced to.

To be honest, I hate it. 

I guess this mostly originate from my secondary school, even though it's a good school, but it taught me nothing about wanting to do something because you want to instead of  you're being forced to, but not really forced in some manner. 

And I've been restricted to 140 words tweets, pointless facebook status ramble. 

So, here I am, sitting here, wondering what happened to that guy that was capable of writing a 600 words to 1000 words essay in a mere 2 hours. 

Essays about life, about the environment or even about ridiculous stories that doesn't even make any fucking sense. 

I hate for fact that facebook and instagram defines who we are.

I hate for fact that I am not longer part of something musical.

I hate for fact my job is draining every little piece of my creativity.

I hate for fact that I've been dwelling on the same issue over and over.

Let's dedicate this post as the last time of speaking of such issues.

Cause we all know in a year's or two's time we wouldn't even feel anything.

NFTB